Category Archive: Discouragement

Who, or What, is Your Strong Tower?

I had taken a high school girl from our Youth for Christ group to a basketball game. She had a curfew, which I fully intended to respect. However, as we sat in the car outside her home after the game, Lisa began having flashbacks from the drugs she’d taken. I couldn’t see sending her into the house with that going on, so stayed in the car and talked and prayed with her. (This was in the dinosaur days of no cell phones.)

Eventually her father came out, looking for his daughter. He was furious, and rightly so. A college woman they didn’t really know had taken their daughter out for the evening and her parents were probably panicking about what might have happened to her. I couldn’t explain without destroying Lisa’s faith in me. Her dad pulled her out of the car, yelled at me with words about never wanting to see me again, and stomped off.

Talk about a sleepless night! I cried and prayed for some time, and finally just committed this to God, with the plan to call Lisa’s father at 10 am and apologize again!

At 9:40 someone came to my dorm room. “You have a phone call in the lobby.”

Picking up the phone, I heard Lisa’s father’s voice.

“I called to apologize for my words and behavior last night. I know you were trying to help Lisa, and appreciate that.”

I was stunned. God had turned something ugly into something good as I too apologized for not handling the situation better, for causing them worry and concern. And Lisa’s parents and I became friends!

A Strong Tower

I think that’s one example of what scripture means when it says “The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe.” (Proverbs 18:10 NKJV) A tower is a refuge, a sanctuary. When Don and I walked the city walls around Dubrovnik in Croatia, we came across a lot of towers in which one could hide, or from which they could attack the enemy. God gives us gifts and abilities that can be a great help to others and ourselves, but we need his sanctuary, his refuge, to protect, guide us and help us meet the attacks that come our way, whether through evil, as the school murders that are occurring more and more frequently, or through illness, loss or doubt.

If my security rests only in myself, it can be removed in an instant. Having had two major surgeries in the past nine months, I’m well aware of my physical (and sometimes emotional) limitations. Watching me get up from a chair or table after sitting awhile, following a total knee replacement, is not a pretty sight. I’m humbled by my own limitations and try to laugh at my foibles. But I also recognize my confidence cannot just be in myself.

Proverbs 28:26 says “He who trusts in himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe.”

So while I thank God for the blessings he has given — loving family, health, friends, capabilities — I choose to trust him as my Strong Tower, my refuge, my helper, my Lord and Savior. When I am weak, he is strong; when I am empty, he is love and grace and goodness and righteousness.

Have you experienced God as your Strong Tower? I’d love to hear about it.

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire but you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:23-26

Sleepless Nights and Grace

I typed emails, giving directives like shotgun blasts.

I lacked sleep, unable to get comfortable with my leg still healing from a total knee replacement.

Perhaps I was more sensitive, more grouchy, because the discomfort, while certainly bearable, has been present now for five weeks after surgery. The first two weeks I expected pain and discomfort. But after that it just became wearing. Along with that we had (wonderful) company for a week, I took a fall on my new knee, and we have been preparing for our annual missions trip to Mexico which involves a lot of planning and communication and follow-up on my part.

Friday night was another sleepless night, at least initially. Finally I stopped fighting to sleep and got up. I have a Coloring Book Devotional, “Drawn to Worship,” by my friend, Lisa Bogart. So I sat at the kitchen table and colored in the lines (photo left). As I did, I began to pray for the many friends who are in need of one sort or another right now – health, strength, loss, rebellion – and God showed me how grouchy I’d been. I asked His forgiveness and committed to asking a few others for theirs too.

My husband was first. His graciousness to me is a picture of Jesus’ grace, extended freely and without condemnation. “I know you’re going through a hard time. I expect you to be a bit touchy. Just know I’m here for you and I’m with you all the way.” (Which he proved again last night when I couldn’t sleep. Don got up and put the ice machine on my knee, legs propped up on a recliner plus wedge pillow. While I expected him to return to our bedroom while I hoped to get some sleep on the couch, he grabbed a blanket, sat down in the other recliner and spent the night in the family room with me.)

Our missions trip team leader was next. He too extended grace and appreciation for what I was doing.

What a gift we can extend to each other … just a piece, a reminder, of the greatest gift God has given us … grace, forgiveness, acceptance in the Beloved. As I said to Bob, “I can’t commit to feeling better, but I can commit to trusting God for grace for my need each day.”

I’m thankful for my God, who is and extends GRACE and strength for each need when I rely on Him (which I was forgetting to do); and I’m so grateful for friends who also reach out, not lessening God’s standard but also saying “I get where you are. I’m sorry for your struggle, I love you, I support you.”

And my struggles are so minimal when compared with others’ – but they are MY struggles and the ones that God uses in my life.

So … I can’t commit to feeling better, although that will come with time. But I CAN commit to behaving better, by the grace of God. And I might be coloring again tonight!

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28 NIV)